It’s that stomach-knotting time of year when, any moment, summer is going to flounce out of our lives and abandon us. Yes we’ll have blue skies, yes we’ll have sunshine, but the sunloungers will be stacked up and the beach bars packed up as if the whole thing never happened. For this reason I am squeezing in as much sunny SUP as possible. Since the last missive I have ‘enjoyed’ two very distinct SUP experiences, each as incredulous as the other.
The first can most politely described as ‘interesting’ and the blame lies squarely on The Islander. Knowing that pictures are essential to this column, a pal suggested I try the petite yet perfectly equipped ‘Suping Mallorca’, as they are happy to GoPro your experience. New for 2013 on Son Caliu beach, this centre is run by two rather enthusiastic half-Uruguayan-half-Italian chaps – one slightly more enthusiastic than the other.
Praise first, their kit is impressive: a neat row of BIC Ace-Tec SUPs, with barely a scratch on them, accompanied by decent telescopic paddles. We opted for a couple of easygoing 11ft 6inchers (a bit lazy, but hey) strapped on the ankle leash and off we went. The sea was calm, the sun hot-but-not-too-hot and the scenery pretty fabulous.
The beauty of setting off from Son Caliu is that you can head ‘right’ towards the razzmatazz of Magaluf or bear a dignified ´left’ to skirt the doorstep of the cove-front Punta Negra boutique hotel, marvel at the majestic five-star St Regis Mardavall and hear the thwack of balls at Sporting Tenis & Padel followed by whistling dolphins at Marineland – all the time with the superyachts of Puerto Portals as a majestic backdrop.
So far, so normal. Then Mr Suping Mallorca appeared on a board, GoPro aloft. What happened next is difficult to put into words. I was expecting (and grateful for) just one or two shots, however Beverley Goodway (Fleet Street’s most famous Page Three Photographer) was clearly trapped inside the Latin American’s body as he barked out (unprintable) posing instructions. 111 awkward camera clicks later (yes, I did try to stop him, however my pal didn’t help with her sniggering and encouragement) the ‘ordeal’ was over. I had my pictures (and then some).
For the second ‘interesting’ SUP experience I headed to Pollenca and tackled the big wild wavy seas of the north. This time I had a 5ft 2inch blonde bombshell for company, and what she lacks in height she certainly makes up for with adventure. Not only is she currently planning a trifling all-female row across the Pacific (a mere 8,446 miles) but last year she did a casual 1,000 mile SUP down (up?) America’s Missouri River. It only took her a couple of months. Needless to say I felt rather inexperienced (and brunette) as we set off from the beach, but we soon encountered a big leveller – jellyfish.
Anyone who’s been in and around Mallorca this year will know that the jellyfish have been a right pain in the posterior. Scientists have confirmed that the beasties have been more abundant and larger in the Mediterranean this season, indeed I have been stung a couple of times myself, but what I witnessed in Pollenca was nothing short of horror movie worthy.
The bombshell and I spent an hour dodging several varieties of jellyfish and using every ounce of concentration to not fall in. No word of exaggeration (a habit I am very prone to) we passed 50 or more of the things. Some looked like swollen football-size severed heads with entrails hanging out whilst others were the small translucent purple variety with long punch-packing tentacles. All very nice if you’re the other side of the glass at the London Aquarium – not so good if stood on top of them with only a bikini for protection.
Sufficed to say we made it back unscathed and extracted the positives. One – SUP is a sport that works every muscle in your body, particularly your core as you subconsciously maintain your balance, throw in a jellyfish obstacle course and a choppy sea, and I am sure the calorie loss was even more spectacular. Two – I managed to keep up with the ‘adventurer’ and we’re now seriously exploring the possibility of a Caribbean island hop SUP in 2014 (no jellyfish there – right?!).
Sarah Drane
sarah@purplecakefactory.com
